Ground Rules for Meetings & Counseling Training

 1. Participants of meetings will refrain from judging one another. Our purpose is to support one another and benefit from educational resources.

2. Participants will be attentive to who is speaking and refrain from private conversations during the meeting. One person will speak at a time and others will not interrupt.

3. Participants will not pressure others to discuss feelings or experiences.

No cross-talk means that when a person shares at a meeting, the group’s job is to be totally silent and give that person their undivided attention.

A person is to be allowed to share without editorial quips, one-liners, or interruptions from others, including advice or comments that are intended to help. It’s also cross-talk when anyone judges, preaches, interrogates, debates, or criticizes about what someone else has shared, regardless of whether they’re doing so during their own share time.

The only time someone may be interrupted during sharing is if the chairperson or a senior group member feels that these guidelines are being ignored to the extent that group safety and harmony are at risk. This also includes asking people to “wrap up” when they monopolize share time.

* Please do not wear excessive perfume or other products that have strong smells on the day of the meeting, because some of us are very sensitive to smells and it can make it hard for us to endure

COUNSELING TRAINING

(from a suicide and crisis prevention service Jay Steele volunteered with)

Things to Keep in Mind

- Our job is not to fix the problem. Listen and empathize 

- Empathy is climbing down into the hole with them and feeling their burden and seeing it 

  with their eyes

- Focusing too much on solutions can be alienating to them

What to say (to empathize effectively

- "It must be really hard to deal with that"

- "It must be incredibly difficult to have to deal with that"

- "It must be extremely (frustrating, painful, depressing, upsetting, etc.) to deal with _____"

- "I can't imagine what that must be like"

-  Don't robotic and keep saying the same exact words!

Exploring Coping Techniques

- No giving advice!

- No "you should"! No "Why don't you just (do this or that)" !

- Really listen and let them lead the way with ideas on how to cope with questions like this:

- "What has helped you feel better?"

- "How you deal with ______?"

- "Have you thought about trying __________ to deal with ________ ?"

- "How do you think it would go if you tried ____________?"

- "Is there something you've thought about trying but haven't tried yet?